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Does he even love me?

Hi ! Season's Greetings ! Hope all donig fantastic. I threw myself in but og a heart breaking situation here and im totally cofused what to do ? I broke my 14 years of toxic marriage with my husband . I few to another country immediately to pursue my further studies and met this guy. This guy already has long distance girlfriend. He claims to love her so much and keeps talking about her that how great she is. Slowly he started approaching me and telling me how good I am and started touching my body in little but inappropriate way.

I confronted him and told him that I am totally in mess situation and I have become numb I don’t feel anything for you. He said I don’t know even if I feel anything for you but still he kept perusing me by flattering comments. I started taking care of him in every way and started to develop feelings for him. He kept coming close and I tried going away because he was committed and in love. After I tried going away he started becoming very rude and distant to me. Being in same house I felt horrible and I don’t know how but I went running to him asking why he is not talking to me and rude to me then he started to treat me bad and aggressively screaming on me. I was feeling lonely and horrible because I confided in him and told him all im going through and he was the only person I knew in the country.

Then suddenly one day he tried kissing me and I let him. I was ashamed and honestly didn’t even feel nice.. since then he was again nice to me. This cycle kept on going till he got few physical favors from me (other than intercourse) and I kpet growing close to him. I do all his work help him in everything as of im his fulltime made and few physical favors whenever he needs to get close to me. One day I asked him what is all this and we need to stop this or you breakup with your gf and be with me. He said I just have attraction for you and care for you. We aren’t even want to having sex with each other (we do everything else but intercourse what gives only him pleasure not anything I want).

I try so much to go away from him and he keep pulling me towards him . He keeps telling to his GF daily even in front of me. He compares his gf with me every time and try to show how great she is in everything. He said he value me and cares for me but he cant love me as he is committed and about physical attraction that he want to stop but couldn’t . Now he wants to stop because he is going to meet his gf after long and he is scared that experience with me would hamper his pleasure with his GF.

Do feel deep emotions for him and I want to go away from him but I’m stuck in my emotions. Does he love me or not? Even I love him or is this anything else ? Otherwise I’m very strong person but first time with this man I’m falling weak and doing everything I wouldn’t have dreamed of doing for anyone. Why I am weak? I surely know he cant be the one for me but then what is this attachment?

Please help me !

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