I'll try and not be too long winded, but want to give an honest overall picture and ideally receive candid feedback. My wife works out at a gym without me (we do different styles of fitness). Over the course of time in that gym she has developed a gym family (it's a Crossfit gym) and group of friends that for the most part doesn't extend outside of the gym. At this gym there is one male who is known to be funny and very inappropriate with comments... most of us have known that guy at one time or another. That said he is liked and tolerated at the gym there. I've been fine with it as my wife and I both know our boundaries. At one point he made a reference calling her sweet cheeks when she walked by and she in her manner admonished him without being harsh (I know that was meant for so and so not me)... She told me and I was ok with it and how it was handled.
The issue came one night when me and my wife were at a bar and ran into one of her girlfriends from the gym. Her friend snapped a selfie of her and my wife and sent it in their gym group text. The guy then replied with multiple texts as follows: Wow sexy pic!.. Very sexy!! Where are y'all? She replied with location. He then stated, On my way!! The girl I'm confident realized this isn't going to go well and snapped a pic with me in it and sent it on the feed... He then replied, Oh Damn, and went silent thereafter. To include not responding to messages from the girl asking if he was on the way etc. I obviously had issue with this as it wasn't even inappropriate humor but rather an attempt to engage with my wife and direct (humorless) comments made about her. She addressed it with him the next time at the gym and he was apologetic.
The issue. I told her that I do not want her to continue any level of friendship with him. Saying hello in passing etc at the gym is OK, but beyond that I do not believe is acceptable. He made an attempt to come on to her and lost that privilege. Today he text her asking how I was with a sickness I just had and I told her I would prefer she doesn't respond. He doesn't need to text her under any condition even if to check on me etc... This invoked a conversation with her and basically she believes she should be able to not make it awkward in her gym and I'd he text an innocent text reply... or have innocent conversation. '
Who is wrong here? I also should note that I feel somewhat hurt that she isn't more angry at him with the situation and feels a need to assuage an awkwardness with him rather than consider the disrespect he leveled at her and me.