We've been together for over 30 years...since high school. About 25 years ago, we had a big argument, enough of one that I stormed out for long walk to get my head straight. When I returned, we were both sorry it had happened and the first words to come out of her mouth was, "I made a mistake." At the time, less experience in hand, I assumed that to mean that she was sorry for the argument but now I wonder if she was. Why didn't she say, "I'm sorry", or "It was my fault", or "I shouldn't have gotten mad", or something along those lines. But she said she made a mistake, which leads me to wonder, as I have for many years, if she was trying to fess up to having cheated, which may explain why we got into an argument over something stupid to begin with...her feeling guilty.
Truly, a person doesn't make a mistake when they cheat, as it's a choice, not an accidental choice either as it would have to be planned. So in anyone's estimation, is it likely that I have cause for wonder? Did she cheat and when I didn't pursue her statement she decided not to bring it up again thinking all was in the past? This has bothered me on and off for years and pops into my head every great once in a while when something reminds me of those times in the past. I even asked her about this a couple of years ago and she said she didn't remember saying that but it had to be because of our argument. If I found it to be true, I'd most likely forgive her, as it would have happened years before we were married. And it would give me a feeling a finally knowing the truth so that I could put it behind me.
Should I ask her again and be steadfast that I want a real answer and explain to her my misgivings about her choice of words having given me this thought? What is the likelihood she really did cheat?