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On-off relationship and we have a child

I dated someone during lockdown and we now have a child (18 months old), I feel she completely changed during the pregnancy and maintained this new version of her since. She has admitted to lying about herself and was keeping up appeareances to impress me. This new version of her brought huge tension between us, we live apart now and i get to see her and my son a few times a week. We say we want to try work on the relationship however she always doesnt want to talk about the relationship issus and when we do and she agrees to give more time & effort to the relationship but she just stops after a few days and then says shes can't do this anymore. We keep going around in this cycle and I'm not sure how to make things better with us.

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