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“Make or break”

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly two years, most of which has been up and down due to him having two children from a previous relationships and not being allowed to see them. This happened before we met - for the first few months everything was great. We get on well, are like soul mates, till he saw his daughter and she ignored him. His other child he has not been allowed to see in over four years this has all torn him apart and the relationship started suffering (this was a year ago).

I never gave up on him, was always around to support him with all the stuff going on. We have tried contacting the parents of the kids and we just got blocked. We went to the door civilly and the mothers shouted and made a scene so we left. They have now moved so he does not know where they are. We have also tried solicitors to see his kids.

At the moment he is not working due to him not feeling in the right frame of mind to do so and also smokes some weed, so many times he asked me for space to get his head around stuff on his mind, then he can't help but contact me. He lived with his father, I lived with my mother so we are not with each other 24/7.

Then in September last year his father who was an alcoholic kicked him out for no reason while I was there - just started calling him names and being horrible. This again tore him up as his dad has not tried to apologise. He came to live with me and my mum, then got a rented room for himself, then his kids' birthdays came around, Christmas, all anniversaries, he gets depressed, anxious and requests "space". I have tried to understand but would you really push someone away you love?

Which brings to me now... He has not been himself for months, he has gone off sex and closeness, does not want to be around people even my family sometimes. He usually shuts me out, but we spoke this week and he said he is not sure if he can cope with the relationship any more as he feels he is a disappointment to me. Everyone he loves messes him around, feels like he can't offer me anything while his head is not in the right place. He feels like sometimes it's too much pressure. He doesn't want to lose me as I am the best thing to happen to him.

We had a chat and decided that he tries to sort himself out himself and still be together but me to take a step back so he can start doing things himself (as I always do things for him). He was happy with this. Any advice if anyone has been in a similar situation or opinions will help.

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