I'm really struggling to speak to my wife to discuss our children after an affair (on her part). Cutting a very long story short, my wife and I (in my mind) was happy, she was my soul mate and best friend. I told her everything and anything, we spent most of our time together (at work and home) we have two amazing children who I love dearly. I have always played a main role in both their up bringing due to me working from home since they were born. Four months ago my wife said out of the blue she wasn't happy and she had feelings for somebody else (one of our friends) she is now living with him and my two kids, i'm in the family home which is full of memories and ghosts. I still have regular contact with the kids but no where as much as I would like due to having to start a new job (we closed down our business due to no longer been able to work together) she got really nasty and said a lot of lies which involved me been arrested so she could clear out our home. (i hand on heart did nothing wrong. i have no reason to lie on here as nobody knows me) I don't understand how her personality can change so much - I can only think he is manipulating her (don't get me wrong i would like to 'hurt' him shall we say for what he has done, however i know i will be punished for it - so there's really no point. I just don't understand what I did? Everything was fab before - she was in tears telling me at first, so apologetic but then just turned nasty saying it was my fault she's not been happy for months etc. I did NOT once get asked for a sit down to discuss things, where I/we may have been going wrong etc. It literally went form picture perfect to its over! over night. It's really messing with my head and in all honesty i have silly thoughts all the time, my whole world has ended i just want out! but my two amazing kids, i cant leave them - they need me... now more than ever, they are use to seeing me 24/7. I did bath, tea bed, the lot - every day. My eldest screams when i drop him off, begging me not to take him there. "I don't love mummy" "I want to live with you" It kills me!!! (i'm 99% certain that she won't hurt him, no idea about the new guy though) She's now been nice again (personally i think she's having a mental break down) but she says I can come up and do bath time bed time etc, come for tea - come for xmas (wtf) (all with the new guy there) I'm sorry i just can't deal with it - like I say it was just four months ago. It feels so fresh like it was only a week or two, these four months have flown. It's scary. Please help me, people! How do I get over it? I don't want her back, she's a raving evil nutter - I just want to learn how to get over the betrayal??? I hope I have made sense. Can I forgive her? How do I do it? For my own sake as well as the kids. Thanks in advance. One very unhappy lonely dad :( #menhavefeelingstoo

I really need someone to put my life back on track, to turn me back into the mother and wife I once was... a year ago, all that matters to me was my family whom I took pride in and would do a lot for them without expecting anything in return. After all, love is unconditional and as a mother, its my job to love, care and protect them. I didn't even ask a lot from my husband nor did he expect a lot from me. We were just in a good marriage, hardly any arguments between us and we took pride in our parenting and are proud of our beautiful, bright children. It all started when a single dad at school confessed to me that he finds me attractive and admitted fancying me for a while. It all came as a big surprise to me as I do not expect a mum like me to still have "admirers". Although I turned him down but since then my confidence grew and I started enjoying the fact that I can still attract male attention. Six months ago, I met William. I was very much attracted to him, physically and sexually. We started off texting back and forth, first with light and gentle flirting. We met up for a few drinks now and again and have a good time laughing and flirting. Then it soon developed into a bit more and more and then more. I am not one into casual flings or reckless, irresponsible behaviour but then suddenly before I realise, I found myself having an affair with William. A proper full blown affair. By the time I asked myself "what have I done?", it was too late. I have already slept with him. I know it was all principally and morally wrong. I know I have done something very bad and my husband would not forgive me if he knows what had happened. I asked myself what do I want from this relationship with William? Is it just purely for sex? Physically, we both look good together and we are both in lust with each other although William said its not just about that. He said he cares about me and wanted to see me every weekend. He kept telling me he misses me whenever he is not with me and he would send me daily texts messages which were all very sweet to read. I thought I was falling for William because I can't get him out of my mind and I really love being with him. I am so attracted to him that no one else can catch my attention because my heart and mind is just set on him alone. The problem is I can't seem to leave my marriage because I don't want to break my family apart and let my kids and husband down. What I have is beautiful and to destroy it could be the biggest mistake and regret in my life. Yet I can't stop contact with William no matter how hard I tried, I always ended up going back to him again and again. It is like an addiction. Maybe I am in love with him but I am just in self denial. Although William has told me he loves me but he doesn't convince me enough that our relationship has a future. Although I can see myself (on my own) with him but I can't see my children in the picture. William is a single guy, still living a bachelor life and there is no way he would swap his convertible two seater sports car into a family car. Everything in his life is that of a bachelor; even his bachelor pad is so unchild-friendly and immaculate that I can't even imagine my kids sitting on his leather creamy sofa. I can't even see him swapping his bachelor pad to a family home. All signs are telling me is I am a "current" girl he is currently seeing until he finds himself a single girl he is willing to settle down with. I have somehow raised that issue in a joking way with him and of course he denied it. I didn't press him more because I don't want to spoil the fun between us. Also I felt I have no right to press him for commitment when I myself am still married. He did say to me before that I should make my mind up on what I want in life or with my relationship and he is jealous to imagine sharing me. There is no sharing. I have become even more emotionally and physically detached from my husband. Thinking back over the years, we have grown apart emotionally and intimately. There is hardly any connection between us and I am no longer attracted to my husband in a sexual way. No matter how I want to try with him again but I just couldn't find myself interested in the whole idea. I think its because I am so distracted having William around. Sooner or later this is going to come out and my husband will find out what I have been doing. I really have to decide what I want in life but at the moment its nearly like saying wanting to have the cake and eat it. In my dream, if I can, I would just walk away from my marriage and start a new life with William but I cant leave my children behind and it pains me to imagine letting my husband down because it would be a blow to him. It would kill him if I leave. Also, is William the kind of guy who is worth sacrificing for? That question has been hanging on my head. If I leave my marriage for a guy who is worth every tear and pain and manage to have a good relationship and lead a happier life with.... that would be beautiful but William might not be worth the sacrifices. Should I confront William and ask him to be honest with me on what he wants? He got to give me some kind of commitment. Part of me thinks if he can't commit on a long term thing with me and include my kids in, then he is a waste of time and effort. He is just not worth it. But to raise all these with him mean potentially I am at risk of losing the fun I can have with him. And if he said yes he is ready to commit, do I really have the heart and courage to leave my marriage and tear all their world apart? Please please please have anyone been through similar experience or can someone wake me up?

My husband and I have only been married for a year, but we are having some real problems already. He is great around the house and helping with our new baby but he literally breaks or loses something nearly every day. It's getting to a point where I am getting so stressed and upset when I have to replace yet another thing we can't afford (or go without) that it's making me ill. I am at my wits' end and have no idea how to help him take better care of things. I have tried talking to him about it and emphasising the importance of looking after possessions. It's not even just his own things he loses and breaks. It's the children's things – phones, wallets, money, keys, clothes. The list is endless. He also broke our bed, computer, camera, loft door, etc. I have no doubt that each time it has been accidental, but it is getting me so down I have even thought of leaving at times. I don't want that at all as we do love each other and have a lot in common. I know he doesn't value material things as much as I do and I wonder if this is a subconscious thing, but I need some kind of advice and solution suggestions. Please help, I can't afford to carry on like this... literally!

This probably sounds weird. 3 weeks ago I split up with her. At the time I was so sure about splitting up and the reasons behind it. Her behaviour was controlling toward me. Using her past against me. Example: I shouted whilst we were arguing. She left the room. Came back a few hours later and told me because she was in an abusive relationship she felt she had to leave. She speaks down to me which i really hated. Always got to win the argument even to the point of screaming and shouting at me and saying i made her feel bad. I was miserable in the relationship for the last year or so. But felt that I couldn't break it off with her. I did try to talk to her but she always seen it as me being critical of her. I felt as though I couldn't do anything good. But I miss her really badly. I just don't know what to do.

My husband of 15 years left me two months ago. Our relationship hasn’t been great and bad the last two months prior to him leaving. I love him so very much and want him back. Should I just give up? He keeps telling me he’s moved on and accepted we are over but gets jealous if I go out and wants to know who I am with. We have two children who are struggling to cope with their father home. I just want to try and fix this mess and get him back.

I have been seeing a girl for a couple of months and the relationship started off rocky. She spent a couple of days at mine, I spent a couple at hers. We had full-on weekends a few times and we already went on holidays together. She has to move abroad for work and unfortunately I cannot follow her. This is where the relationship started to get bad. Because of the move, she has a lot things going on. The plan was for me to come to visit her twice a month and then eventually follow her. However she preferred to end the relationship yesterday. She cannot cope with the move and the commute to come to my place. I have been feeling very sad and beat down since yesterday. I struggle to come to terms with the fact she's leaving me.