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“Why do I always have to be the strict one?”

My ex-husband and I have been apart for over 5 years. We share a daughter who is 18 and just gone away to uni and a son who is 15. We have always shared time with the kids very evenly and he has always supported them financially...BUT...I am really struggling with his laid back approach to their education and studies.

My daughter was always quite academic and it was always a battle to get her to study, and she has done OK. My son is less academic but has aspirations of becoming a mechanic working with boats and/or cars. I am trying to encourage him to put in some effort especially in Maths and English because without these grades his options will be really limited.

My son thinks I just nag him and I believe his dad agrees with him, I have tried talking to my ex but he says 'don't worry, he'll be fine'. Neither will listen so I always look like the strict one, my son seems to be staying at his dad's more often... less rules, cash flows and no chores... why wouldn't that be more appealing. I don't know how to fix this before time runs out for exams!

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