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“I'm in love with him but it's complicated”

I met him about four years ago. We got along right away and became friends. He said he liked my friend but I kind of thought he liked me. After a while I told my best friend I liked him and she told me I should tell him so I did after I thought about it. he felt the same. It was so simple. Not complicated. It was too easy, I wasn't worried about girls liking him or him talking to other girls. It just worked. It freaked me out and I also wasn't ready for a relationship at the time. So I broke up with him.

He was hurt. Really hurt. We continued to be friends and my friend started dating him with my permission. He then texted me one night and said “I still like you”. I wanted to say I felt the same but I couldn't hurt my friend so I just talked him through it. We continued to be friends. Some things happened that didn't have to do with him that caused us to be distant. We didn't talk for almost a year and he broke up with my friend and after a bit he started dating another girl. He didn't want to talk to me. I asked him why and he kept switching his reasons. I missed him.

A month ago he texted me only saying "hey". I deleted his contact to help me get over him so I replied "who's this" he said a week later "this is" I replied "K?" He said "yes" we talked for a bit then I apologized for not being the greatest friend and the end of my sentence was "I want to say more but I don't think it'd do so much right now" hinting at me liking him. He said it wasn't my fault and that it was his. We were okay. We have been talking lots more.

Last week we both went to a fire, he brought his girlfriend and he hugged me. He gave me these looks. And talked to his friend whiling looking at me. After he left I texted him and said "hey there", he replied "hey A!! It was nice to see you, how's the party going" we talked for a bit and then he said he had to go to bed an he would text me tomorrow. He sent me a good morning text. It was so nice to wake up to. He was flirting with me, he even sent a heart and corrected it to be a laugh face.

I want to tell him but it'll hurt his girlfriend and what if he doesn't feel the same? Ugh. I think I should tell one of my friends that's good friends with him. Maybe he would know. What do you guys think?

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