My boyfriend have had a rocky relationship. Three years ago we lived together for a year, kept seeing/sleeping with each other off and on for another year, then took a break for a year. Now we are back together - it's been almost six months now. This time around it seemed almost perfect. No fighting, lots of great sex, laughing and truly enjoying one another. It felt like my dream relationship and I was ready to exhale.
But things have changed recently. He seems aggravated with me, and extremely bored all the time. Sex has all but stopped. He even masturbates with me in the bed next to him, tires to hide it but not really. This makes me feel undesired and bothers me tremendously. I get up and sleep in the spare bedroom when he does this and he seems to not notice my absence. I have asked him what the problem is with us, he makes up excuses but blames it on me. I'm talking to other guys, I'm possibly on Tinder (which I have never been on Tinder), or I'm talking to my ex again. The biggest excuse is I'm on my phone too much, so when hes home I put my phone away. I have seen the signs, he might be cheating, which he has done in the past. But he will never admit it.
I want to know what the deal is with his masturbating? I'm literally right next to him and he tries to minimally hide it. And doesn't care that it obviously bothers me. It makes me feel like he would rather play with himself than play with me. I have not discussed this with him, I don't know how to even bring it up without shaming him. But I'm the one who feels shamed. I have asked him if he just isnt into me anymore. That I will move out and on if that's the case. We end up arguing and he tells me to do what I want to do, he doesn't tell me to leave but he doesn't tell me to stay either. We disagree but leave it at that, but we never make up either. No make up sex, no sex during the day, no sex at all.
Please help me. Is this relationship a lost cause? Am I beating a dead horse here? I'm scared that I am. I really wanted this to be my last relationship, I thought he was the one. Now I'm starting to question the entire relationship from day one, three years ago. I would appreciate any advice. Thank you I advance.