My husband of 23 years has moved home to his parents' house. He’s angry at me because I haven’t contributed financially to the home and bills. When he first left he said, show me some small income and I’ll come home. Now he’s talking divorces. I have a small child to look after. Why is he so angry?

So… I really don’t know where to start from… I’m 15… yup I’m underaged that’s the reason I cannot go for serious mental health treatment.. cause my parents think teenagers like me cannot have any problem with their mental health… I mean they ain’t wrong I literally have nothing to be depressed over…but I still wanna end my life most of the time… my parents are hard workers they work day and night for me to be happy.. we have loans on our heads but they always stay so calm about it in front of me… I’m from a middle class family and my parents try their best to make me a happy person…and as a result, they have crazy high expectations from me… they tell me they see potential in me to fulfill their expectations…as a result when I doubt myself (which now that I think turns out to be literally every day) I end up having a quarrel with them…they do say mean comments to me…but their actions are justified… My mood is off literally every day without any reason…actually not every day but most of the time. And when I’m not sad and sulking over my non-existential problems, I’m hyperactive.. I have got this wired tendency of lying about fake scenarios…mostly about my parents beating me up…or body shaming me…well they, I mean my mom does that…but not every day or week…she does it only when she sees that I’m getting indiscipline… well back to fake scenarios.. I tell them to my friends just because I want sympathy…why would I do this… I realize later that I’m painting my parents as the bad guys in my life… I’m living under a lot of confusion… I lie about my mental health…I lie about most of the things… this email may be the first time I’m being completely honest with someone… a stranger…because I’m too scared to tell this to anyone else… and even if I get jugged by the receiver of this email…I won’t know that… Back to my abnormal mind… so my actual problem is that.. I feel I’m worthless… but sometimes I think I deserve better… to be more precise I have 2 types of moods… one in which I’m Hella overconfident about everything… my body…my face… my life…myself…I love everything… and then there is the 2nd type… which is opposite to the first one.. I feel sad…unhappy with myself… worthless… stupid…. A faulty for every problem in my life…. in others life… I hate my body …. I hate myself …. Most of the time I feel the second mood…to be more precise I actually love being in my sad and depressive mood… I hate being happy…not because I think I don’t deserve it… (well I do when I’m in my second mood).. but because for some reason I love being sad… I really thought this was depression… but I really don’t have a reason to be depressed.. I feel like an attention-seeking girl within my friend circle because I’m have lied countless times to them… they ask me why is my mood off I say I don’t know…they say there has to be a reason… I come up with a lie… and tell them their life is better off me… and everything goes back to normal… at this point, I feel like a burden to them… and honestly they got really annoyed the last time when I was in my depressive episode… I genuinely feel like a burden to them t this point…and well this depressive episode which I’m having is not going away…it usually lasts for a week or so… but this time it has been 2.5 weeks… and as I’m trying to lessen the burden I’m being to my friend I thought over it…. It’s really the time where I need to find out what’s wrong with me… it will be good for everyone… no I haven’t tried self-harm… I had many triggers this past week… but something in me stopped me from cutting my wrist… One more thing I have body image issues … I feel fat 24/7…except when I’m in my happy mood…. I do starve myself sometimes… The main point of writing all this to you is because…I feel something is wrong with me… and I need to know what is it… I may sound like a lunatic to you… but I hope I’m not the only person in the world feeling all this.. and if I am… well help me to become normal… I’m tired of being like this… I just can’t help it… Hope you can help me… it actually feels good to type out and tell someone what’s going on inside me… I hope I won’t judged to bad for this…

I have been together with my boyfriend for 9 plus years. We have an 8 year old together. So why will he not divorce his ex-wife? They haven't lived together for 9 years, we got involved very soonafter they split. We both have our own houses and he even move in together. He comes over am

I was dating my ex for around a year and thought we were strong and suddenly four weeks ago he dumped me by text and said he wasn't in love with me and never was. Some background to this. We met last year and neither of us were looking for a relationship it just kind of happened both of us had been badly hurt i was in an abusive relationship and felt i couldnt trust anyone but he was different and i fell in love with him and we were happy so i thought. I knew he suffered depression as do I but we seemed perfect. Then his father had a stroke and weeks later we found out cancer on the brain and lungs caused this and he died within 4 weeks of us finding out. I helped nurse his dad daily and he asked for my help and supported my partner throughout and was with him when he passed away at christmas. I did everything to support him i even collected his dads ashes as he couldn't face it. He became depressed and withdrawn and a bit cold towards me emotionally and physically he lost interest which i completely understood as he was mourning his dad. Things seemed to be getting better then suddenly he told me he didnt love me and i was to needy even though i was there at his request constantly and i can find someone who will treat me like i deserve to be treated and loved and he didnt want a relationship or intimacy with anyone at the minute and hes not even sure what the hell he wants in his head and needs space. As you can imagine its broke my heart im in love with him and adore him like mad and i dont know what i did wrong. But...now he cant stop texting me daily and wants to spend time with me and wants my help and advice and he texts me every day all day and even last week while he was in spain he spoke to me and text me as soon as he got off the plane and wanted to see me as soon as he got home and i stupidly went because i love him so much and he said he wants me in his life. Hes also going off to Paris in a couple of weeks to sort out and run a new business and has to be there for two weeks and home for a week for the next 3 months and im so confused with what's going on with his feelings towards me as he obviously feels something but im scared to ask because i dont want to lose him completely. Could his depression have made him say those horrible things to me as ive never said a bad thing to him and we've had one fight in all that time and i dont know what to do as i dont want to be with anyone else but him. Will being patient make him realise what hes lost with me? Help..

My husband and I made the decision to separate late last year and have recently moved out. He has now needed to leave town for work. Our separation came at the end of a long relationship that began 14 years ago (at 16 and 25) and has putted along, not altogether unhappily but with discontent and basically living completely separate lives for the last 5 or so years. We have one child together who is intense behaviourally and he has not been supportive of my struggles with her, so I have worked part time and managed her as best I can while he has worked full.time and pursued his own interests and hobbies at leisure, never feeling that time at home or helping with our child should be prioritised. Last year it culminated in him travelling overseas several times alone and having a relationship there which has now ended. I see this as the catalyst for ending our relationship but not necessarily the whole reason - none of it would have happened if we were happy together. I don't feel as though we have ever been able.to bring out the best in each other. When he first wanted to separate, I was sad (mainly for our daughter) but worked through those feelings, developed peace with the situation and our need to separate and some months later (officially separated but still under the same roof) very tentatively began a new relationship. After this started he backflipped and said he wanted to be back together. He thinks that he is ready to change. The relationship has been up and down basically since the beginning and I honestly feel like the best thing for both of us would be to peacefully and amicably let it go and work on reconnecting him as a parent. I am ok with the whole thing - a little sad but also excited about rediscovering old hobbies, making new friends, starting a new job and seeing how my very cautious new relationship develops now I am living alone (well, with my daughter). He is not emotionally expressive like me, is holding on to a lot of regret and sadness and is really struggling. I am really worried that he won't be ok on his own, and I still care about him deeply and this hurts me a lot. I guess what I want to know is: How do I know if we have made the right decision? Should I get back with him again, do heaps of counselling and really, really try to make it work (obviously ending the new relationship I have begun, which I would struggle with at this point) for his sake and for our daughter? My gut feeling is that if we did this we'd just be delaying the inevitable. If not, how do I help him move on from the relationship? We obviously are still communicating because of our daughter. And how do I go forth and be happy with someone new when I can't shake the feeling I've left a trail of heartbreak behind me? I know this is too long (and yet still so much is left out)! I don't really expect anyone to have the answers but any ideas or experiences would ve helpful. Thanks :)

I am a married man, I have a wife and 2 teens. I’ve been married for over 15 years now. My wife is a good mom, but her lack of drive for success, and the mentality of being a housewife has turned me off for many years now. I’ve had a conversation with her about 7 years ago about going out there and getting her degree to challenge herself and help the family financially, I was always met with negative responses. Asking her to get a job was somewhat insulting to her and she tends to tell me I’m to blame for because I don’t like the jobs she applied to (they were not worth the time for the money) and she refused to get a job at decent places with good benefits (like Walmart or Aldi). In any event, through the years I’ve grown professionally and financially with very little financial input from her. I’ve taken care of her parents abroad as well as mine and I feel like I’ve just been a cash cow for everyone. I’ve had numerous discussions with her about my feelings and she finally decided to go out there and get a degree (because she senses I'm going to leave her) which I’m helping pay for, but for many years now I have not been connected to her emotionally, I don’t love her anymore and many things happened between us and her family where she didn’t back me up and chose her family instead. I am only married to her because of my kids. The sex is there just to take care of our needs, we don’t even kiss. During the pandemic I started trying to improve on one of the 4 languages I speak. I met someone on a language app, we started talking, very quickly moved to video conversations and we both started developing feelings. We share many goals, aspirations, and she is the complete opposite of my wife in so many levels which just draws me to her even more. She is also married. We’ve been romantically talking for 4 years now online consistently. Her husband is a macho guy who wants her as a maid essentially, she is putting her self through school with the help of her grandfather (who dislikes her husband) and is on her way to becoming a lawyer this year. I love everything about this woman. We met in person (I had a work trip to her country). We had great conversations and made love, I felt so at home with her I couldn’t believe it. I have never felt so happy in my life, never felt like this with my wife. She has never asked me for a nickel, and she’s helped me in some many ways, I feel like a different man with her. We both want out of our marriages, but I’m afraid of hurting my kids (16 and 13) and disrupting their lives. She is willing to leave her husband for me, she too has a kid (8 years old). I also don’t want to hurt my wife, I don’t love her but I don’t also want to hurt her self esteem and she also cannot support herself financially yet as she is in school till 2024 and working 1 day week for now. She knows I don’t love her like the first day we got married, we talked about it, tried working on it for a few years but it’s no use. We are both in our 40s and I am not happy with her and I feel I’d be giving up my own happiness if I don’t pursue my life with the other woman whom I love. I also feel my wife deserves to be loved, by someone who truly feels for her, not me. I don’t know what to do.

Me and my SO have been together for 4 years and we now have a 10 month old daughter. I No longer feel the way I felt when I first started dating him. I’ve been battling depression since I became pregnant and ever since then things have been different. He barely touches me ( I can’t remember the last time he’s touched me), it feels as though there is no more chemistry or love between us anymore. When I cry and explain to him how I’m feeling down or suicidal he figures out a way to make it all about him and pretty much makes me feel as though it’s my fault. when I first had our daughter he seemed as though he would help way more with her but in all honesty the last time he changed our daughter was when she was 2 weeks old .. and as I stated above she is now 10 months. He is a great father when it comes to financial issues but he does nothing when it comes to making bottles, changing her, putting her to sleep etc. him doing nothing makes me have hate for him more and more everyday and I am to the point I no longer want to be with him. I struggle leaving because I grew up without my father around and I want my daughter to grow up in a home with both parents .. do I put up with it for the sake of my daughter or do I just stop trying and end things.

My boyfriend and I have been together for over 7 years. We've had quite the unique relationship. We started dating at the end of high school, and in our first year he went to Thailand to study his TEFL and he was away for 6 months. We worked through it and after that, he came forward to me that he actually has depression and it did get to a point that he was too proud to seek help until I approached that I'd leave if he didn't get help. He eventually did and it was a rocky road for him to find the correct medication etc. In 2019, he went to university as he finally saved the money he needed and also got the bursary he wanted. It was long distance again but it's what he wanted and I told him it would work out not matter what. I decided to move to the same city as him in 2020 because I was having family issues and I needed to move out anyways. In 2020, lockdown hit and he had to go back home. University was miserable for him because he felt he was forced into something he didn't want to study. Later in 2020, he did a suicide attempt in which he was admitted. I think this is what finally broke him that this isn't the life he wanted and he wanted to fight this. Cutting to now, he found the correct medication and he's doing so well! We decided on a city to live in and now he just doesn't feel romantic feelings anymore. I don't understand this? Upon telling friends as I needed support, they were all relieved saying I deserve better and they didn't like him anyways because of the stress he put me through. Is that all they really see about him? There's more to him than that. Depression wasn't his fault and I chose to stay because I felt in my heart it was right. He's coming today to talk about things and to try second chance this but if all works out, I'm scared to be letting my friends down. But I feel no one outside the relationship understands fully what it's like. Yes those years him battling depression was hard and it was total agony but is it not enough that he's better and he's doing well for himself? My family said he's put my life on hold but has he really? He's always encouraged me in everything I do in terms of my studies and career path. I'm really stuck here...

What can I do? I'm upset and sad.

I honestly did not think this day would come but I am in a sexless relationship. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and half. Sex-wise we were doing great but things started to slow down and now have stopped for the past three months. Here are some things I/we tried: 1. Asking him to speak to someone about his depression - he said he didn't want to waste his money. 2. Speak to a doctor - he went for a check up and said everything was okay (although I'm skeptical about this) 3. Communicate - he said he's just too stressed and tired or in pain from work 4. All little booze - we started but he said he was too tired to continue 5. Me outright asking him - he was very passive about it and then said he will eventually He also has a pretty unhealthy lifestyle for someone approaching his 30s with some weight gain. I feel like I'm trying my best to be patient and he keeps saying things, but not following up with actions. Our relationship also lacks intimacy because he says he not "deep" like that. So I don't have much to replace the lack of sex. It is almost like we are friends... kissing also almost never happens unless I initiate it. I really don't know where to go from here... I cannot even say if this is legitimate reason to break up. Does anyone have any insight?