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"Am I wrong to wait for him?"
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It's been over one month I still cannot get over what's going on. I'm gay btw. The story is just way too long but I still need to tell it from the beginning for better understanding. I met this guy through an app. He literally lived over 17.000 away miles from me.We talked for awhile and we had a lot in common; however, what I felt was him being a good friend. One day he confessed to me that he loved me. But like I didn't want to reject him directly and I said we had to see each other in person and see how things go. So probably we got time to know about each other a little more.

I was stupid during the time because I felt alone in my country so I went on Tinder to look for some friends. I stumbled upon this guy and dated him. I still kept talking to the friend let's call him A. Then I told A that I found a boyfriend and things have been alright. But the boyfriend needed to fly back to his country for his education and we still dated. The boyfriend became so distant when he got back to his country and one day he asked me if he could hook up with other people because he felt so bored. I felt so broken inside but I convinced him not to and we still dated.

I didn't know if A was hurt knowing that I wasn't single anymore but A decided to book a ticket to make all his way from 17.000 away just to see. I accommodated him when he visited me. We did what lovers would do like going to restaurants, coffeeshops or just laying in bed hugging each other for the whole day. We developed this kind of feelings for each other, and one night I lost my sobriety and went for a kiss. I realised that I really really liked him more than just a friend. I never felt so special in my whole life and he made me aware of how valuable being alive is.

But I was still committed to the relationship so after A flew back to his country, I needed to keep a distance between us but still texting him like we were very close friends. We talked literally every day and cared about each other so deeply. At that point, I knew that I didn't love the boyfriend and he didn't love me either so I decided to break up with him to let us both free. I just wanted to ask A to be my boyfriend right away but like it would make it sound like he was my backup plan, so I waited for a little bit more so I could naturally get close to him.

Unfortunately, one day A got into trouble with some unexpected legal issues, he was never involved in something that serious. He wasn't able to be calm and he didn't talk to me much about his difficulty. I thought he just needed some time and I gave him a break but I kinda missed talking to him. And then He just disappeared for one day, two days then one week two weeks. I couldn't stand it any longer so I asked if he was seeing someone. And it turned out that he started dating someone else for a few weeks and I never had time to confess my feelings to him. It's literally like he loved me too early and I loved him too late. And I cannot get over that fact that he's being someone else's.

It's been over a month and I don't even know what's the next step to take and I've been feeling guilty for what I did to him and missing him so much. I cry every single day for how dumb I have been. He is literally the best person I have ever met. He made all his way from his country to mine just to see me. He checked on me every second when I got lost and called him just calm myself down. He stayed up really late just to help me with my assignments. When my mom got into the hospital he was there for me and provided me with unexpectedly financial support. All of which my ex-boyfriend would never mind. I can't even start loving someone else and all I want right now is just him.

Am I so selfish in this situation? I just really really miss him and want him back so badly. He still stays that he wants me in his life and he wants to fix everything but he just doesn't know how. I just hope that he means it's possible for us to get back together in the future. I have been losing my sanity and I just really need help.

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User article | long distance
“He has no time for me”
Just a question about my relationship with my boyfriend I have that's left me lost. I recently posted a question I had about him due to feeling distanced and feeling avoided by him but we worked that out and I told him I needed some time to cool off because what had happened was really driving me insane and was stressing and frustrating me too much. He agreed that I could leave to calm myself down but then when I came back he'd try making some time for me and making changes that we had spoken about. So now after two days of just keeping to myself trying to clear my mind, I see him online and I message him (and please bear in mind that this was 3am his time). Our conversation didn't last long, but I did have the belief that he'd be happy to see me but it turns out it didn't really matter too much. He was just playing games all night long. Now here's the thing: when we're on good terms and we spend time together and he has to do something he makes sure to leave exactly on the dot and he plans time in advance to be able to do those things, he organises well. But now that we haven't been together much lately he seems fine to just lose time and stay up all night just playing games as if that's the only thing he has to do. And please also keep in mind that after a couple days of no communication with him, I message around 3am his time and the conversation is so dry and only lasted a couple minutes and at the end he didn't even respond to say anything, he just ignored me and kept playing for another 2 hours until he decided to go offline and go to bed. He always has time for everything else except me and when I tell him that he tries to convince me and says no that's not true. I don't even know how to explain what I feel. Another thing that I should probably mention is that I helped him find God. He has been attending church regularly and he's truly engrossed by everything to do with God. He even tries reaching out to people as much as he can and spreading the word of God and I'm truly grateful that He does that. But sometimes when I think about that I wonder.. 'How does he attend church, read the Bible, pray, speak to memebers of the church, try his best to live for God and not understand that he's hurting people around him. How doesn't he understand that it's hurtful and kind of rude to just ignore someone? Is his games so much more important than me?' I know he'd say no but I feel sometimes that he loves me just by word of mouth because his actions speak differently to me at times. He can make time for his family, for errands, for friends, for anything. Just not for me. And if he does, I get a few minutes of conversation that he isn't even really into and just end up being ignored. For the time being, I'm just gonna leave him alone and let him come to his senses, I think I'm done with always having to remind him and being stuck in a loop of the same things. But is there any way I can approach him or do something to make him wake up? I'm so sick of having to always be on the receiving end of this and I just don't know what else to do to get through to him.
User article | long distance, religion
“Was my partner cheating?”
Dating for 2 1/2 years I'm in California she is in Nevada. Had a few breakups she has major issues with me and my ex wife being compatible we have kids. In March of 2017 we had a short breakup like a week. We were talking and texting the next day after the break up mostly still Arguing which turned to when I was going to drive to see her then got back together. I asked back then if anyone hit her up, she said a guy she worked for texted her telling her he was divorced from his wife she told him she and I broke up. She told me that was it. Fast forward to January 2018, I'm on her computer looking for a certain pic of us and find a sexually explicit video sent by this guy. In the same file was similar videos of her... obviously sent to him. Called her out she lied saying he or she didn't send anything which then went to He sent video then She did but she didn't remember what she sent etc... She said this happened over a TWO day period during the "break up" Which wasn't really a break up.. I'm petty messed up over all this as doesn't go down that way theses days does it? I asked if they slept together she said no and had stuck to that for two months... Not sure i believe that at all... He is a total freak as she is too, so I'm not convinced. I feel she is still lying so Im about to break it off... Any thoughts? Opinions. Oh and then she tells me just the other day that the videos that were sent were some of the ones shade and sent to me... . She said she did not make them specifically for him.. What do you think I should do? She also was sexting him for that time as well, I told her I saw conversation, she said it was non stop for the two days...advice?
User article | trust, cheating, long distance
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