My husband and I have a pretty decent sex life. It's often, but we can sometimes be a bit lazy when it's been a long day. About a year ago, I found out that he was following a ton of porn accounts on every social media account that he owns. I started snooping after feeling uneasy about his time in the bathroom. After discussing it, he deleted the accounts. I tried to go along with it to be the "cool wife," even though it honestly made me feel inadequate and also disgusted by him. He insisted that they were old accounts that he had no interest in and deleted them, though. A few nights ago, I was trying to find a bookmarked website on our laptop when I saw a few porn pages bookmarked. Apparently, his phone somehow linked with the laptop, because I realized I was in Mobile bookmarks. I didn't outright let him know what I found, but I sat him down and finally told him truly how him watching porn made me feel (without accusing him of anything). He started to get slightly defensive, but didn't. By the end of the conversation, I'd gathered that he wasn't watching it anymore. Today, I was going to see if a picture that I tagged him in on IG shared, because my phone was being dumb. Instead, I saw that he had recently followed nearly 100 more accounts than when I saw his profile last. There were nearly 100 porn accounts that weren't there after our conversation recently. In fact, some of them weren't even porn accounts. They were normal women's accounts who happened to wear skimpy outfits sometimes. A couple of them were girls who are local strippers. I am so sick, physically and with the relationship. I'm not sure if I should tell him what I found and try to have a civil conversation (again) about it and try to work through it, sleep in separate rooms until he gets it together, or just leave for a little while. I know this is so drawn out, but I'm at a loss. I cannot compete with the looks of these women, and I don't want to feel like I have to.

In this video we talk about what really happens when you cheat and what you should do after.  Cheating is a topic many people are afraid to talk about. Many people still unfortunately have to go through situations like that. As we got a question about cheating last week in our inbox, we decided to make a video about it. It is our advice on how do deal with the fact of cheating. No matter if she cheated and he's affected by it or he cheated and she's affected by it, we kept it as general and honest as possible. In this video we are talking about why people cheat, how to prevent cheating and what to do once you already cheated on your partner or have been cheated on. A topic unfortunately many people still deal with and don't know how to get out of that state of mind. We hope this Video helps you getting closure in certain areas! Much LOVE PAX&Q

Ok this is a long one I have been with my husband for 15 years and married for 8 we have 2 children At Christmas he was out on his Christmas do i was browsing through Facebook before i went to sleep and a photo popped up with him tagged it showed him very cosy with a young girl. it disappeared around a minute later from Facebook but it was enough to make me think, so the next opportunity I got I looked at his phone and found more photos of him and this young girl on his phone.They are with other people but very cosy and they look like a couple. I did not mention it at first but i just tried to have a discussion about our relationship in which he admitted he had not been happy for 2 years. I thought then and there it was over but he sent be a huge bunch of flowers and seamed to want to work it all out. However i just couldn't shake the pictures from my mind so i eventually brought them up. He assured me they were just very good friends(his words) She had worked with him for 2 years and i had no idea who she was. its only a small office i know all the other ladies by name and i have never had any issues i used to pop in every now and again (for valid reasons he forgot his lunch things like that at his request) i had never seen this girl or heard him mention her. He then said he hadn't mentioned her because they talk about me?? As you can imagine things deteriorated between us and i was very hurt angry and confused. I lost a lot of weight and he seamed pleased by this kept telling me i looked great i was only a size 12 before all this (she is about a size 4 thats a guess very skinny) But then in the middle of all these arguments he though it was appropriate to book to go to Vegas with his friends. Ordinarily i wouldn't mind this but I had wanted to go to Vegas for my 30th 6 years ago at the time we couldn't afford it which is fine and he promised me we could go for my 40th i have been planning this and looking forward to it. financially we are a lot better off now i have been promoted and earn equal to him and there is the option to do overtime whenever i need/want. We could afford for us to go to Vegas now but i wanted it to be something special for my 40th. We have no debt nice cars a lovely house but i would give it all away to feel like i matter to him anymore. I'm struggling to understand why he is staying with me. No I'm not going to pretend I'm perfect I'm not i get very very angry and shout and sometimes say things i don't mean not violent I'm not a violent person at all. classic me (we wouldn't be here if you had kept it in your pants) but i often feel that i do these things to get him to sit up and take notice (wrong i know as it just makes him angry) We find it hard to have conversations without them becoming a argument. His work organise charity things and i have never been invited to 1 he says he wants that part of his life separate from me and he should be entitled to have that. i don't want to stop him doing anything i just want to be part of his life, i don't want to go to everything i know we have issues with childcare my parents live a long way away but help when they can, his parents are closer but don't really do much. I'm really struggling. He now says he's suffering from depression. I have booked him an appt at a the Drs. I'm trying to be supportive i know how horrendous depression can be. When i look back tho i don't think he has ever really considered me and I've probably just put up with it but I'm so so hurt by the Vegas thing he says he going and that's that. What would you all do? I'm lost, confused and don't want to destroy my children's lives. If you all think I'm in the wrong please say I'm especially interested in a male perspective. I have male friends but they are my friends and obviously give me the whole what are you doing with him get rid talk but i am also fully aware they only have my side.

Hello I am new to this site and have been with my boyfriend for 17 and a half years. We have a son with a hidden disability. We have been through a lot together (including his mother trying to split us up when we had been together 10+ years together but he cut off contact with her after she lied about me and tried to manipulate/blackmail him about other situations and having a negative involvement in our dog and son’s lives). We are very close and spend a lot of time together and we both have issues trusting people outside of our relationship from past issues with family and friends. He has always been honest with me and has told me of some women at his work coming on to him which he has felt uncomfortable with. All 3 women know he has a family and how long we have been together. Woman 1 – young woman who is very touchy with him – touching him on shoulder, leaning on him when he is sat down, making sexual comments about herself, always looking for reasons to talk to him etc. He has always been a joker and has used this as a shield to get the message across that he wants her to away and stop touching him etc. Woman 2 – a woman who likes to go out for drinks with him and his team. He walked her home once as was worried about her being too drunk and she tried to drag him on top of her at her home . He text me asking me to ring him so he has an excuse of getting away from her but has been asking for him to catch up for some drinks alone which he has done once at lunch at work to get out of doing it after work and being in a similar situation as last time. Woman 3 – this woman has always told him he thinks he is attractive and wished he was single leaving him notes on his desk that he is fit etc. She has been cheated on herself so knows how it feels but still comes on to my boyfriend. He had to tell her that I found out about her coming on to him and was not happy to be polite and not hurt her feelings but to get her to back off. She stills make a bee line for him when he is working in the office and is very forward with him. I trust my guy completely and know he wouldn’t cheat on me and is worried about causing issues at work as he works for his family as I had to hand my job in for my own health issues as well as my son’s as we was struggling to juggle everything between us. Plus his father cheated on his mother and although he doesn't get on with his mother anymore it is something that he has always been against. My boyfriend knows about my unhappiness and said do you think he will cheat and when I said no but it angers me how these women just have no disregard for his relationship. His response was I can’t control actions of other people but know that I am not going to return their behaviour and if I trust him then I have nothing to worry about. I know he is right and I get so annoyed with myself but can’t seem to stop myself. How do I stop this irrational jealously?!?!

My boyfriend, we'll call him Bob, is not from Ireland and frequently complains about not having that many friends in this country. He has a best friend who is his ex (not exactly his ex, she was with him a lot while she had a boyfriend, they used to video chat where she would strip for him etc..). She is in another country now. She has no problems with cheating until she gets married (she sounds like someone who is lacking morals, and just a person I wouldn't get along with). She apparently messed him up a lot and now he doubts himself. Bob and I started dating and his "ex", we'll call her Sarah, would text him things such as "use her (me) to get experience then come show me what you learned etc." He tells me he put her in her place and said he's with me now and that he loves me. Now Bob claims Sarah has changed and respects our relationship (I don't believe this). He says he doesn't have many people here so he likes having her as a best friend. I've noticed he is reluctant to open messages from her around me, and if she calls he'll go into the other room. He then tells me what she wanted etc. He promises me that nothing is there anymore between them. I really am uncomfortable with their relationship and I've said so before. Bob then tells me that he loves me and that nothing is going on. Am I just becoming jealous? I've never been a jealous person before but now I actually can't stand Sarah and have a horrible feeling every time Bob brings her up.

Me and my girlfriend have been redoing our flower beds (taking out rock/putting in mulch) and a guy from work has picked up the rock we’ve taken out so far. However last night she said that he wanted to come by and get some more rock but we haven’t gotten around to finishing so there wasn’t any. He says that he can get it himself and my girlfriend said she felt obligated to help him. A couple things that concern me are that they get off work at 4am so it’s dark outside. Not sure how well you can dig up rock in the dark. It took me and her around 4 hrs to do the front on a Sunday as well. Also I asked why she felt obligated seeing as how the guy requested the rock and we didn’t have any ready. And it’s not as if he’s in dire need of it. He’s just using it to fill in a ditch supposedly. I’m not sure if I’m jealous or what but I’m not really cool with this. I see it as a project for me and her. I don’t want to look at it when it’s all done and think it took me, her, and some dude. I want it to be something we can be proud of together. Anyways If this is just jealousy I can accept that and be cool. If not what do you think I should do?

My boyfriend was talking inappropriate stuff with his girl bf who he kissed long back before we met and discussed about marriage also which didn't happen. After dating me also they both continued talking inappropriate stuff, when I got to know this I asked him to stop he stop talking to her now, and we are planning to marry. Recently I got to know that before when they were talking to each other my bf despite of being in relationship with me asked her for a meet up in a resort before attending their common friend's marriage but apparently the meet up didn't happen. Now should I forgive him or not?

My boy friend has a friend. She's also an ex girlfriend of his. A few months into our relationship, she started calling him and he swore up and down he wanted nothing to do with her he'd never talk to her again all that stuff. Well we ended up breaking up for a bit and he made up with her. He's told me, how strong her feeling are for him and how if he isn't constantly telling her they aren't together than she's thinking they're so close that she's dreaming of white picket fences. I don't think If he is still with me, which she absolutely hates, that it's appropriate they stay friends, mainly because of how she feels about him. But he refuses to stop being friends with her. Am i out of line to ask him to leave her alone? I mean they were together at one time. That alone is enough for me to not want them spending time together. He sees only a friend and she sees her future husband. Am i wrong?

May you please help me out? I don't know what's the problem, maybe it's me overthinking or something else. I'm in a relationship with my partner, and I caught him flirting with girls twice a year. From there I lost trust and I never recovered from that incident. Okay, he has female friends and even now I don't trust him when he's around them, and I hate it when he makes comments about them like giving compliments, sometimes making jokes about them that they're single. And I told him how I feel about that, but all these things just add up. I just don't trust him when he's around females at all. I did forgive him about the flirting but I just can't get over it. Another thing - we used to post each other on social media but he stopped. I confronted him and he told me that it's not his thing, he doesn't like posting pictures, and yes that's true but my question was why you gave me a wrong idea when we started dating. Why didn't you come out straight? And I stopped posting him as well even though it wasn't easy but I didn't want to look like a fool or be desperate, although I really like posting. Any suggestions on how I can deal with my situation would be much appreciated. Thank you.