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“I wanna break up with him but I can't”

I have a boyfriend but I am mad at him for reasons I can't say without breaking down. I think I wanna break up with him but I can't hurt him because I'm his first girlfriend, which I don't believe but whatever. I have liked this guy on my drill team for so long, and he likes me back but I don't know what to do about my boyfriend. And I'm currently being bullied by this guy I used to date about two years ago. He has been spreading false rumors about me for two weeks, going on three. I have anxiety attacks every so often and it can't be helped. I shake and cry and it's scary because sometimes I can't breathe well anymore. I need help. I don't know what to do about this.

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