Hi, I had my baby 3 years ago, and his dad was unsupportive throughout the pregnancy and postpartum period. He eventually left when my son was 6 months old. As a singer, his career would take him away, and he would constantly posting things on social media relating to other women, sex etc. This made me feel really horrible, but if I approached it, I would be called controlling. He is a very public figure, snd I live out of london, so I was not known to his followers/fans/video girls.
He left the country in 2019, and has returned, with expectations of picking up the relationship again, and being an active father. Whilst he professes that he has time to reflect, change and understand how poorly he behaved, I struggle to look over the past. I find myself getting overwhelmed when I see him publicly complimenting other women. It makes me feel as though I am not good enough, because during our most vulnerable time, he never put me up like that. I don’t know if I am being insecure, or if this is an actual thing that other women have experienced?
My PPD period was awful, I hated that my life was put on hold, I lost my job, had to move back to my mums. His life during this time was completely different, he was travelling the work, partying, and filming videos with women all the time. Despite this, he is the only man I’ve ever been besotted with; I want him in my child’s life. Or is this crazy? When we are together, times are great, it’s when he is away and I see what he does online, it makes me have doubts. Thanks, A