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At a crossroad of what to do

I am married for 18 years, a little over 2 years ago i caught my wife having an emotional affair with our kids coach, I approached them both and they put a stop to it. My wife said she was feeling desperate and lonely due to my depression and not helping out around the house, I have health issues and over the last few years it has gotten worse and my way of dealing with it was to retreat into my own world.

I understood what i created and was willing to let it go, about 6 months after I had Surgery and was in a rehab facility for 2 weeks, when I returned I found they had been at it again this time exchanging explicit photos back and forth. Again she apologized and swore it was over as did he. Since he is a coach to my daughter and it is a one on one situation it would break my daughters heart if we pulled her from that facility and coach so I let it go again.

Since than my wife changed her passcode on her phone (but I know the new code) she even changed his name to initials in her contacts. I saw just this week that they text all day from 6:50 am to 7:20 pm, I leave the house at 6:30 and returned at 7:30. it was all friendly type stuff but it is driving me crazy knowing that she didn't text or call me until noon that day and it was only to answer my text.

I want to confront the coach again however I'm afraid that my temper will get the best of me, when he sees me he is all smiles and wants to talk like we are friends and all I want to do is slap him. I have even thought about contacting his wife and letting him know what has been going on. As for my wife I don't know what to do we are still living as a happily married couple however we she has not come near me in over 2 years other than a peck on the lips. I really need help please!

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